Cool Secret, Bro

Monique is the worst. She’s certifiably the worst, actually. Probably has a framed certificate in her room, saying Monique: The Actual Worst. Congratulations on your achievement!

The minute the weather gets warm, she’s up and giving people advice on what to do with their air conditioning experts, but oh, didn’t you know? Her daddy was the developer of a revolutionary new air con technique, that one that you see without any fans. It just makes cold air from…I don’t know. Something more environmentally friendly than before. All the air conditioning companies close to Oakleigh have been using it recently, in all of the shops, and despite it being pretty decent, the sight of it makes me think of Monique. Perfect, pretty Monique, heiress to an air conditioning empire.

Too bad I know Monique’s dirty secrets! Her dad was locked up in some weird facility for super evil geniuses after he tried to freeze Melbourne with a giant cold gun, and now they’re making him work on air conditioning innovation. That’s right, Monique…you’re not the only one with special parents, and mine are really terrible at separating work and home life, allowing me to easily guess the password to their work email account. 

Some very interesting characters locked up in that place, but I happened to notice that one of them had a story very much related to cold, the same surname as Monique and they were being put to work designing eco-friendly air conditioning. Sound familiar?

Unfortunately this is a tough sell, even IF I think Monique has crossed a line and needs to be taken down a few pegs. Plus, there are some idiots here who’d actually think it was pretty cool that her dad is a supervillain.

New plan! I’ll continue to enjoy the best air conditioning repairs Melbourne has ever known, while I find a way to reveal Monique’s dirty secret to the world. I just have to take the fact that her father attempted mass-murder and make that sound like a bad thing.

-J’tosia